I was just thinking...

Being the analyst that I am (my wife calls it being nosey) I often notice that there seems to be a lot of out of control kids these days. When I say Out of control, I don't necessarily mean bad, it's just that these kids are very determined not to listen to their parents.

I always cringe when I see this because I have flashbacks to my own childhood. My parents were old school. There was no bargaining and from day one they let it be known that their household was not a democracy...there would be no voting or consideration of opinions. In fact their motto was when they wanted my opinion...they would give it to me.

My parents, unlike many parents of today, were not afraid to be the bad guys! They had no problem at all with hurting my feelings if it would keep me alive and keep me from becoming a menace to society. During my adolescence, I didn't quite understand it, but now as an adult with children of my own I can clearly see it.

When it comes to dealing with my own children, I take a different approach. Like my parents before me, my household is not a democracy, but at the same time i constantly wok on making sure that my children know and understand that they can trust the decisions that I make. As much as it pains me sometimes I also admit when I am wrong. Unlike my parents I also try to be as transparent as I can be...instead of telling them them to be nice to people I let them observe and catch me in the act of doing it myself.

When my children were small I didn't negotiate with them I made sure they they clearly knew that there such things as boundaries and when they are crossed there are consequences. Now that they are teenagers I find that those early lessons have paid off.

I might just be old school but I think too many parents are taking advice from people who don't even have children, and they are trying too hard to be their friends. Here's my two cents mom and dad...they will have plenty of friends but you are the only parents they will have...so be the parent!


What Do You Think? Are today's parents push-overs?

    This weekend was one to remember, as it was marked with the passing of two well known African American celebrities, Bernie Mac and Isaac Hayes.   Although both of their deaths were untimely, I think Bernie Mac's is the one that surprised me the most.  At 50, he was only 10 years older than me, and in my opinion he was still on the young side.  Both Mac and Hayes have made and left their mark in their career fields, Mac as a King of Comedy and Hayes as the Voice Soul. 

The passing of both of these men has men thinking and wondering if we (African Americans) are as conscious about our health as we should be, or more directly am I? 

 

Sounds like an interesting combination of subject. What could Lending a Hand, Praising God and Dirty Words have in common. They are all titles or the subject matter of recent articles I published at AC Content.

Lending a Hand:   Addresses the reality that sometimes when you extend a hand to help someone, you just might get more than you bargain for or expected...knowing this do you still try to help? As always colorful illustrations are used.


Worshiping God: Conversations With The Rock, is a fun poem/short story reminding us of the importance of making the time to acknowledge and worship God. It's humorous and relatable, I think you will enjoy it :)

Dirty Words:  Cleaning It Up, is an expose on my struggle with several dirty words...as always there is a twist!

I welcome you to read this, feel free to let me know what you think.  

I'm not a fan of Paris Hilton...but I have to admit her campaign ad was pretty funny...what do you think? Here's the news report on it and the actual ad itself

See more funny videos at Funny or Die

Not really...but some days it feels like it.  It only takes a moment of letting my guard down and before I can catch myself I am saying things like, "When I was your age...I had to walk more than twelve blocks to school"  (which I really did)  or I catch myself saying things like.  "There was no such thing as an allowance...I only received money by cutting grass, raking leaves and shoveling snow or some other menial task!"  (I made pretty good money too)   As a kid I was sure that my parents were putting 10 on the 2 (exaggerating), but now that I am older and have kids on my own I realize that as times change and as culture changes, there are a lot of things that we no longer have to do, and so there truly are some drastic differences in the way things are done.  After having conversations with my children I discovered that when the wife and I share the things that we had to do, it does sometimes seem outlandish or far fetched.


Another bad habit I noticed that I have inherited from my parents is speaking a different language when I am scolding my children.  Sometimes no words come out at all...it's just a combination of grunts and gestures and vivid facial expressions, but somehow they manage to get the message loud and clear.  I think that it's some primitive form of verbal parental dyslexia.  Letters and words become jumbled when you attempt to scold.  For instance while scolding my son and checking to see that he is listening I asked "Boy!  Do you Under-Hear Me?"   (a combination of do you hear me and do you understand me)  these phrase usually have and adverse effect as they sometimes sound ridiculous and elicit chuckles from the scoldees.

Over the weekend I was amazed and had to turn my parenting brain off while we were out in public.  I couldn't believe the number of young parents I saw that had absolutely no control whatsoever over there children.  In several cases the young children were almost injured as their parents stood by begging and pleading with little Johnny and Mallory to come out of the street while the little kid blatantly ignored them almost being run over.  Seeing all of this thrust me right back into that mold..."why back in my day I would have never even dreamed of defying my parents like that...man..they would have smacked the taste out of my mouth  for even contemplating or entertaining the thought in the back corners of my brain..."  To which my children respond..."We Know Dad...We know"

I few summers ago we pulled up our old patio. The plan was to redesign and relay the flagstone patio. Unfortunately a major storm hit and did some minor damage to the house and our focus shifted to those repairs. Shortly after that I aggravated my old back injuries and couldn't do much of anything.

This summer I decided that it is finally time for me to finish this project. The truth is I really wasn't all that excited about having to move those stones again. 700 square feet of flagstone is nothing to smirk at.

I couldn't put it off any longer, as my new office looks out into my back yard, and it was as if those piles and piles of stone were just taunting and teasing me. Not to mention the fact that the bees, birds and bunnies were using the stones as a hiding place.

Last week I began the process of moving the stones and getting them placed back onto the patio (hence the light posting) As much as I am not looking forward to lifting and moving those heavy stones...I am looking forward to when it's done so I can sit out back in the cool of the evening with the love of my life. So if you happen to notice my postings getting a little light...I didn't  abandon you...I'm just playing the handyman role.